It’s the 20-year anniversary of Nirvana’s “Nevermind”! I was a teenager when this cd was released. Wow….smells like Middle-Aged Spirit.

The kid on the album cover is pissed for two reasons: One, he didn’t even get paid the dollar he was chasing in the picture; and two, his penis hasn’t grown since the baby photo.

Who’s that kid? That would be Mr. Spencer Elden, whose name sounds like he’d be a British Duke and Captain of his Cricket team; but in this photo, he looks like every kid I’ve seen behind the counter at a DQ:


Okay, to be fair; in this very different image…..Spencer looks like Robert Pattinson with an extra chromosome:


Seriously, Spencer didn’t receive any checks for the album pose; even though his father helped design the cover! There’d be no “Nevermind” CD cover with his old man; and the only green Daddy got was in Kurt Cobain’s roach clip. Come on, Courtney Love; at least give this boy some haircut and acne med money!

Nirvana gave birth to “grunge rock”, which killed “glam rock”. FUN FACT: The band Ugly Kid Joe had the world’s worst timing: They were a perfect glam rock band whose cd debuted merely weeks after Nirvana’s. Where are they now? Well, I started to google them, then I was like “nevermind”.

As for Nirvana…..Kurt Cobain’s considered a musical genius who completely changed rock n’ roll; Dave Grohl’s in arguably the best real rock band today (The Foo Fighters, for those of you who don’t own an FM radio); but what ever happened to basist Krist Novoselic? He became a politican, a published author, and is now studying to get his law degree. Jesus Fuckin’ Krist. Rumor has it he’s also working on a cancer cure and a solo cd titled, “Overachieving”.

Spencer told a reporter a few years ago, “It was kind of creepy [to think] that many people have seen me naked. I feel like I’m the world’s biggest porn star.”

Well, to be a porn star; you actually have to be having frequent sex. And no offense to the iconic Mr. Elden, but I don’t think chicks are lining up to shag a 20-year-old who looks like a cross between a stoned carny and Rapist Suspect #3 in a C.S.I. lineup.


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